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Back Shadenfroida Dumfries and Galloway Standard October 2008
There is one thing that is sure to lift the spirits of a farmer who has had a bad day. That is to hear about another farmer who has had a worse one. The Germans have a word to describe this feeling, “Shadenfroida”. So in the interest of bringing a little happiness to some fellow farmers, in these difficult times, I would like to share with you the run of disasters, mishaps, and misjudgements that have happened me over the last few months. Three mechanical disasters started my run of calamities. They were, in chronological order, the cylinder head gasket blew on my pick-up, the clutch burned out of my tractor and the engine seized on my quad bike. The pick-up and tractor were mended at considerable expense but the quad bike was so bad that it was changed for a new one. Within a few days of my new quad being delivered I set off up the farm road. My eyes were firmly fixed in the fields and my brain was in neutral. The next thing I knew I was lying on the tarmac with the bike on top of me. It transpired that my wife, Janet, had been coming in the other direction on our other quad bike. I hadn’t seen her and we had collided on a corner. Of course, once I got myself gathered together and made sure that neither of us were hurt, I tried to blame the incident on her…that was one of my “misjudgements”. The cost in financial terms of my mishap ran to nearly £3000 to fix the bikes. But, I found the lack of conversation and withdrawal of privileges, as a result of my misjudgement, was a far higher cost to pay. The silence at the breakfast table was, however, soon to be broken with the sound of the hallway ceiling coming down with a crash after a pipe had burst, under the floor boards upstairs. The new ceiling and associated decorating that will be needed in the hallway will complement the new fridge, washing machine, microwave oven and electric cooker that have recently been purchased within a few weeks of each other. It seems that domestic appliances and banks all seem to topple at the same time. Meanwhile, out on the farm there was no let-up in the disasters. My Highland bull decided to go on a world tour and soon found my neighbour’s maiden heifers. When I came on the scene he was short of breath, frothing at the mouth and covered in sweat. Fortunately my bull looked to be a good deal calmer! A few days later yet another disaster occurred. I had left the handpiece connected to my shearing machine after clipping the tails of some mule lambs. An old ewe that had been kept back in the shearing shed and left overnight had very kindly reached through and pulled the start cord of my shearing machine. After spending the night trying to cut its way through a breeze block wall my handpiece was scattered over the entire floor area of the shed. Oh did I mention that the new £2400 stock ram that I bought for my Bluefaced Leicesters is currently firing blanks. There seemed to be no respite for us but fortunately, just in the nick of time, Janet and I managed to get away for a few days, last weekend, to relax and forget our troubles. Well that was until we got within ten miles from returning home. Our pick-up broke down! Remember the pick-up, from the start of my saga, the one with the new cylinder head gasket. It was taken away on the back of a breakdown truck yesterday. Where this story will end I have no idea but in the meantime happy shadenfroida. |